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What Parenthood Taught Me About Leadership: Lessons from the Chaos

 

I still remember the day I logged back into work after my second child was born. It was the middle of the pandemic. Daycares were shut, nannies were out of the question, and both my partner and I were working full-time from home—with two young children who had no concept of 'Do Not Disturb'.

There were days when I’d be on a video call with a baby on my lap screaming in the background and a toddler tugging at my sleeve. Nights blurred into mornings. Meals were often a negotiation. And amidst all this, I found myself in a conversation with a mentor, venting about everything I wasn’t able to do—missed meetings, delayed commitments, and the constant feeling of falling short.

She listened patiently and then said something that changed my perspective:
“Instead of focusing on what you’re not doing, try looking at what you’re building. You’re surviving something incredibly hard. That’s not a weakness—it’s a strength. What doesn’t kill you will make you stronger.”

That conversation stuck with me. And this blog—long overdue—is my attempt to reflect on the skills I unknowingly built during that time. Skills that I now bring into my professional life every single day.

But I didn’t do it alone.

I had an incredible partner by my side—someone who evolved with me through every messy, beautiful, chaotic moment. Both of us are engineers by training, and that mindset became our secret weapon. We approached parenting like a product sprint: we designed schedules, ran weekly retrospectives, and iterated constantly. When one of us was overwhelmed, the other stepped in. We weren’t just co-parents—we were a team. And that experience taught me one of the most valuable lessons of all: being part of the right team makes all the difference.

1. Mental Agility

Parenthood during a pandemic was a crash course in switching contexts at lightning speed. One moment I was designing a product, the next I was calming a tantrum or changing a diaper or troubleshooting a Wi-Fi issue during a meeting. This constant toggling sharpened my ability to shift gears quickly—an essential skill in fast-paced work environments where priorities change by the hour.

2. Creative Problem Solving

With no external help and two demanding jobs, we had to get inventive. From building toddler-friendly routines that aligned with daily schedules to creating quiet zones for meetings, we engineered solutions on the fly. Not always were we completely successful, but we got better day by day, week by week. That same creativity now helps me navigate complex product challenges with fresh perspective and confidence.

3. Resilience Under Pressure

There were moments when everything felt like it was falling apart. You could be in the middle of a presentation to leadership, and your baby chooses to scream in the background. But we kept going. That period taught me how to operate under sustained pressure without losing clarity or compassion. It built a kind of quiet resilience that now anchors me during high-stakes launches, tight deadlines, and unexpected setbacks.

4. Empathetic Leadership

Parenting deepened my empathy in ways I hadn’t anticipated. I became more attuned to non-verbal cues, more patient with ambiguity, and more understanding of others’ struggles. As a product maker, this has helped me build stronger, more human connections with my team—especially in a hybrid world where emotional intelligence is more important than ever.

5. Team-First Mindset

The biggest takeaway? The power of partnership. My partner and I didn’t just survive—we adapted, supported, and grew together. That experience reinforced the importance of being surrounded by people who lift you up, challenge you, and share the load. In the workplace, this translates into building and nurturing teams that thrive on trust, collaboration, and shared ownership.

Parenthood didn’t pause my career—it transformed it. It taught me to lead with heart, think on my feet, and stay grounded in chaos. So if you’re a parent feeling like you’re barely making it through, know this: you’re not just surviving—you’re evolving. And the skills you’re building now might just be the ones that make you an extraordinary professional.

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